Accountability

    I am wanting to loose weight and feel fit and healthy again. So, I have been reading and praying about the topic of accountability quite a bit.

          The Bible says much about Christians gathering and spending time together to be stronger. "Iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another." Proverbs 27:17 We all have heard it. We know we are stronger together.
     "Where two or more of you gather, there I will be also."Matthew 18:20.

      With these verses and so many others, an idea of an "accountability partner" has come about. Interestingly, the idea of an accountability partner, doesn't stay in the Christian world. In church we have prayer partners or accountability partners we can call when facing a trial. But, in business, fitness, and so many other areas of society, this idea has caught on.

     I was reading a business book the other day to help encourage my business mind. The other says it is great to have an accountability partner to encourage each other to not fall behind on your hustle, your goals.  Read any challenge: Green smoothie, exercise, detox, running, house organization, etc. and they all tell you to have an accountability partner to help and encourage each other to follow through.

     I'm not so sure an accountability partner is always helpful though. I definitely understand that you need to surround yourself with like minded people to stay focused. However, I have had some accountability duds. I'm not saying the person was a dud but, the activity that it was supposed to support became a dud.

    It makes me wonder if I picked the wrong kind of partner. Should you choose someone as ambiguous about the activity as myself. Someone on the low rung of the thing I want to accomplish, so we can go it together? Should I choose someone like they do in AA? A sponsor, someone that has been there before but, is on the rode way ahead of me? Or maybe an "expert". Someone that has never struggled with what I am struggling with. Or even a close family or friend that you adore so you can accomplish together.


     I have seen holes in each of these kind of accountability partner. Let's take the first. Probably the most popular because it can take little effort if you want it to. I have had this kind of person as a helper, and encourager, as a pusher. It didn't work. If that person chose to eat cheesecake and beer for the weekend, what am I really going to do? And if I had a Birthday to celebrate, they always said I should go for it and eat the cake. Is that encouraging me to my goal? NO. They are a friend. Someone that doesn't want you to dislike them. And I don't want them to hate me either for being a task master.

     The second kind, the Sponsor type like AA is another choice. This is great, really my favorite kind. But, there are issues here. Not everyone is the same. Just because they went totally vegan doesn't mean that is the best choice for me. Just because they could run 6 miles the right out of they gate, doesn't mean I can. If I were to disagree in their nutritional advice, won't they just think I'm not disciplined enough to do what they did?? This is uncomfortable, unless you are paying them.

     The third type of partner I mentioned is a "professional".  I suppose often this might be helpful if you are paying someone to do this job. But, there is the fact that many of the health experts have never been overweight. ( Unless it's Richard Simmons). They were always athletic and motivated by exercise. Can they really relate to me and my struggle?

    The last one I called out was the beloved friend or family member. This is probably the worst one to do. Again, I don't want to be seen as a nag. I don't want them nagging me either.  Funny how we see the first type as a task master and a beloved friend or family member as a nag.  Well, I do anyway. It's hard to be with someone that you are so close to, that you share many of the same stresses and challenges. Birthday parties, vacations, all of these will be shared and easy to blow off the regiment you are trying to stay on. And those lazy days where a Netflix marathon and a bowl of ice cream, snuggled on the couch seems like the best plan, that loved one would probably rather snuggle or nap instead of go for a hike.

Pizza and Ice Cream. YUM!!!!!

     So, what will I do? I have really been struggling with this.  Here is where I have come to; I have God and myself. Right now I have some things to work through in me that I'm not super excited to share with the someone else.  I am struggling with me waking up and crawling out of bed to hike in the cold morning. No one else can be there when the Littles crawl in bed in the morning and my husband is sleeping peacefully. No one else is there when I am fighting the Blanket Monster to actually get up. I have decided that for now, besides sharing ideas and thoughts here, I will read my Bible in the morning,  and then get up with God to go for my walk/ talk with HIM. He is who I want to be doing this for. HIM and me. My body is to be HIS temple then HE should have a say. And who else can motivate me better then the LORD himself? I'm tired of disappointing myself and feeling less then great when I am not motivating to someone else. God won't disappoint me by have a pig out day because See's Candy was on sale, and He already knows my weaknesses.

     I do have a good Dr. friend that is helping me with what I am doing.  I have my darling husband, that can be a bit of a saboteur. I mean it's so hard to get out of that  comfy, warm bed with him in it in the morning. He can't help making it hard for me to leave in the morning. And I have a friend that is very health minded. She is always on her treadmill and running (now that she runs 5 and 10K's). She shares yummy healthy recipes whenever she tries a new one. I have decided that I have support of some key people but, I don't want them to be holding me accountable. Well, I am more motivated to do this for me then for anyone else right now. I know I'm breaking all the rules but, I am really enjoying going on my hikes alone and spending time praying and talking to God. I can clear my head so well without the prater of someone else, I would have to small talk with. I know that sounds anti-social.  As a mom that homeschools 2 young children and 2 teenagers, and is with at least one of those kids 24 hours of most days, I need 1 hour to be quiet and uninterrupted. I don't need a vacation away from my family but, I do need an hour. One hour 5 times a week. Funny how I can let other things get in the way of that 1 hour.

     I'm going to go make a smoothie so I don't munch while I get the families dinner ready.

What do you think? Have you had success with an accountability partner in the past or at the present? I'd love to hear how it is working out.

All kinds of goodness in there.

   

New Year, New Goals

Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good
and not for disaster,
to give you a future and a hope."

   



     I don't usually make a bunch of resolutions. I tend to break them too fast, and then feel like I failed. However, with that said, this year I decided I would use this time to start fresh. I'm calling them goals though. Not resolutions. Just to be clear, goals, not resolutions. ( I think I may have an issue with that word. hahah) I have several things I want to do different this year. So, I will write them down here, and then there is a record of them. Hopefully, this year I can follow through.

     Spiritual- I want to be reading my bible daily. I will read or listen to at least two chapters a day. If I am not studying or reading in a particular area I will read the daily Proverb (there are 31. Makes one a day) and my Birthday Psalm. (I am 42 I will read the 42nd Psalm until I turn 43.) I will be able to study these and meditate on them.
     I will spend quiet time with God daily. At least 20 minutes each day. I will practice just BEING in His presence.
     I will encourage my children to continue reading their bible daily and to go to there bible study group weekly.
     I will continue to go to our bible study weekly, once it resumes. And do the weekly study.

1 Corinthians 10:13
"The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure."

     Physical- I will walk 4-5 days a week. At least once a day for at least 30 minutes each time. Hopefully, I will be able to do more then 30 minutes but, I want to get in the habit of getting out each day again.
     I want to be healthier and loose weight (who doesn't?hahah). I want to lose 35-40 pounds by the end of the year. I will use a food tracker, use my pedometer to get my 10,000 steps a day, and add the Essential Oil Protocol that I have written down. I want to feel good and go down several sizes.
     I will drink one-half gallon of water a day.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20
"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body."

Philippians 4;13
" I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

2 Timothy
"God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline."
(this one I need the most!)

     Mental-I want to focus on the positive. I will look for the blessing in every situation. Even the seemingly bad ones. I will list 5 blessing each day that bring me joy. I will choose joy and not focus on the unjoyful things in life. I will keep my focus on what He wants me to do and be.

Philippians 4:8-9
" Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me-put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you."


     Emotional-I will not dwell on hurts and emotional heart ache. I will not stew in anger. I will let the Lord have those. When I have trouble with emotional pain or old scars, I will spend time with His word and meditate on those words instead. I will ask the Holy Spirit how to release those pains. I will find patience for my children and those around me. I will exercise that patience. I will not let how others perceive me hurt me. My family, close friends and God know who I am and I will be happy with that.

Psalm 39:2-3
"I kept very very quiet... but, I became even more upset. I became very angry inside, and as I thought about it, my anger burned."

Psalm 32:3 
"When I kept things to myself, I felt weak deep inside me. I moaned all day long."

Relational- This one is easy and hard for me. For my family it's easy. For others it is hard for me. I have a hard time giving time to others then my family. And that is what I am going to do. I will give time to others. Time with friends to build on relationships. Also, time to those that make me uncomfortable. I know that is odd but, with my anxiety, I have trouble wanting to even talk with others. I will reach out and talk to people and make an effort to talk and connect with others. I tend to not want to let others outside of family encroach on our family and our time. Maybe to a fault.

Proverbs 27:17
"As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another."

Galatians 6:2
"Bear one another's burdens."

1 Thessalonians 5:11
"Encourage one another and build each other up.

Hebrews 10:24
"Spur one another on toward love and good deeds."

Financial-  I will help to pay off our debts and save where I can. I will consciously look for ways to save money rather then let it bleed out.

Romans 11:36
"Everything comes from God and exists by his power and is intended for his glory."

Deuteronomy 8:18
"Remember the Lord you God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth."

Hebrews 13:5
"Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, " Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.""

Vocational- I will work at my household and keep it well. I will plan out menus and schedules to keep it tidy and running smoothly.
     I will keep the kids school schedules working and keep them on track. I will keep classes and credits updated and encourage all of them to reach further then they think they can daily.
     I will work at the Oils and build on my business. I will help Greg where I can in his business to help build it and secure new business.


Colossians 3:22
"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart."

Colossians 3:23-24
"Work hard and cheerfully at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Remember that the Lord will give you an inheritance as your reward, and the Master you are serving is Christ."


     Ha! That is quite a collection of goals.  I really want this year to be different. I feel like I have gotten in a rut. I am on a cycle that is stressful and unhealthy. I have gained weight due to the stress, and haven't been able to loose it. I want to be happy and joyful about all that I have. Not worry about what I don't have or what I once had.

     I would love company on this journey that I have before me. I will help others to be accountable as I would like someone else to be accountable to. I crave to have a friend come along side me and say, "We can do this." I will add this to my prayer list.

     OK so here it is. All written down. YIKES.